Steps
to change - Michael Hargrove
There are four stages of learning each of us go
through. These are the exact same steps we all
take in order to learn how to walk, or how to
play, or how to acquire any new skill or habit.
The first stage is called unconscious incompetence
or pre-change. That's when we don't know how much
it costs us to not do the things we don't know
we should be doing. This stage becomes a reoccurring
roadblock to success for those who consider themselves
an "expert." And when we think we know
it all, we tend to be less open to new ideas and,
consequently, that tendency eventually stops the
learning process all together. Both of which are
the kiss of death in our careers. Hence, it's
important that we acknowledge the profound difference
between being an expert and owning a level of
expertise. The "expert" seldom attends
any seminars or workshops. While the "student"
knows that learning events outside the work place
are fertile ground for taking their career to
the next level of success. The "expert"
rarely reads books or other publications about
their field anymore. The "student" is
an absolute pig for that knowledge and information.
The "expert" constantly looks for reasons
why new ideas or strategies won't possibly work
and often uses phrases like; "the right way"
or "the best way " which is generally
the only way they know. The "student"
knows that nothing works all the time and rarely
will any one thing be effective for everybody
but if it's working for someone else, then maybe
it will work for him or her too.
Which one are you?
The second stage of change is called conscious incompetence
or waking up. That is when we do know how much it's
been costing us to not do what we now know we should
have been doing. This is the single most important
step to change; the broadening of our awareness.
Fortunately, once we get to this stage, we seldom
ever go back to the first one.
Einstein once said, "The more I learn, the
more I realize I don't know." Socrates once
said something to the effect that, "The only
thing I know, is that I know nothing."
If we don't fall victim to simply dismissing a "new
way" the first time we hear about it, then
the next and third stage of change is identified
as conscious competence or choosing change. This
is where we struggle to master what we now know
we should do. This is usually the most awkward of
the four stages where we feel the stiffness and
strangeness of trying something new or different.
This is also the stage where most children excel
and most adults fail.
We need to follow the example of that child learning
to walk. After each fall, we need to ask ourselves
what we learned, what could we do differently to
get a better result, and how quickly can we get
back up and try it again? Take it from someone who
personally knows; if you fail enough, it stops hurting!
In this, the third stage of owning a new skill,
we may also feel discouraged or disheartened as
we fall back into old habits or old ways of doing
things.
It is perfectly natural to feel and do just that,
but with patience, perseverance, and practice we
will get to the fourth stage of change, which is
unconscious competence. This is when the things
we know we should do come naturally and become a
habit. We no longer have to struggle with a new
skill. We own it. This is where techniques stop
being simply techniques and actually become a part
of us. We no longer even have to consciously do
something. It simply becomes a natural thing for
us to do.
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